Hens Lay Eggs
food for thought
In memorium
My parents celebrated their 55th wedding anniversary on November 14, 2019.
Four days later, my father died.
Dad wasn’t in good health. He’d been in heart failure for the last few months. But still … we didn’t expect Dad to die quite so soon or so suddenly. Here’s his obituary. He was 79 years old.
Two of my brothers called to let me know what had happened, what was happening. I called my husband and he came home from work. We packed, called a nephew to take care of the animals, and headed out. Dad died while we were en route with just another 100 miles to go.
I took a two-week leave of absence from my work, notifying clients on the fly. I did what I could to help my mother. I wept the day after we returned while washing dishes.
There’s usually a reason–not necessarily a good one–why I don’t post my usual blogs. I won’t finish my latest work-in-progress either by the end of the year. I take these personal commitments seriously. But this time, I’ll simply beg your indulgence.
My father died and I’m still grieving.
Authentic or offensive?
nWhen editing other authors’ work or delivering unsolicited advice, I counsel fiction writers to imbue their work with realistic details. The reasons are many, but they all boil down to one thing: the reader’s trust. If the reader can trust the author with the small details, then the reader will gladly take the author’s metaphorical hand and trip the light fantastic into the most imaginative of realms.
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nAuthenticity requires realism.
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nHowever, I occasionally encounter too much realism in fiction. When authenticity overpowers fiction, it may turn offensive. This distinction may also determine the boundary between authentic and marketable.
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nOne such example comes from “dark,” motorcycle club, and BDSM romances. I know some readers get a kick from a hero (or antihero) calling his one true love a slut or whore or other, even more derogatory term. However passionate, that kind of terminology immediately switches a story from authentic to offensive for me.
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nThe man who loves me ought to know better than to call me such a derogatory name, especially when speaking to me during moments of intimacy. Men who respect women don’t use such language when speaking to those women. Women who expect respect don’t accept such language when spoken to them.
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nThe same goes for racial epithets, which some subcultures routinely use to refer to each other. Using those offensive words might be commonplace among that subculture–and using those terms with a light touch adds that necessary element of realism–but saturating dialogue with such terms overwhelms.
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nOne cannot help but wonder if the author, too, thinks in those terms.
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nMy thoughts on the topic go beyond mere profanity. Reflecting on the way too much authenticity tips over into offense, I’m reminded of comedian George Carlin’s 1972 monologue on the seven dirty words you can’t say on television. (If you can’t tolerate profanity, then you shouldn’t listen to this.)
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nThe saturation of offensive words and profanity in characters’ dialogue demonstrates the limitations of those characters’ vocabulary, just as it shows the limitations in a real person’s vocabulary. Most of us have encountered the individual who uses the “F-word” every other word when he or she spoke. That person uses it as noun, verb, adjective, and adverb. Speech saturated with such words loses its shock value because we become desensitized to it. Sometimes, I juxtapose eloquent literary verbiage against the deliberate insertion of such a word to add shock value.
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nDesensitization to offensive and profane words does not improve our language or strengthen our vocabulary. Those whose language is so limited lose the ability to deliver or understand stinging insults or high praise without them. Like stereotypes, language informs the reader by assigning a commonly understood trope or archetype. A gangsta from the ‘hood employs much different speech than a church bishop, or a noble lady from a lowly maidservant. Our use of words and the variety of words used give rise to assumptions of education and intelligence and wit.
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nLike passive voice, when it comes to authenticity (aka realism), sometimes less is more. Authors seeking to tread the line between authenticity and offense often dance on a knife’s edge.n
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Forget the gift cards – #MFRWAuthor
52-week blog challenge
My latest acquisition: silver with garnets by Michael Hayman Jewelry.n
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nThe challenge of giving a personal gift is knowing the recipient well enough to anticipate what he or she likes and wants and probably does not have. For instance, I love fur. I love to stroke it and sink my fingers into it. However, I love fur best when it’s still on the animal. I have a moral objection to furs such as fox, mink, ermine, etc., because those animals aren’t killed for anything but their fur. We don’t use their flesh or bones. In the same way, I have no objection to leather, because we eat cattle, goats, pigs, and deer. Their bones are useful, too. In short, if we’re going to use the whole animal, then let’s use the whole animal, including its hide.
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nWith that understanding, someone who knows me well would know that I like fur, but I don’t have any and don’t want any.
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nI also love jewelry, especially jewelry with colored gemstones. Someone else can have the diamonds; I especially like emeralds. And rubies, amethysts, aquamarines, pearls, peridot, lapis lazuli, etc. I’m a bracelet junkie, but I don’t wear rings. Someone who knows me well, will know that I prefer bracelets over necklaces and dangling earrings over studs.
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nHowever, it’s impossible to always know well the persons to whom we give gifts. That’s where investigation comes in. What does he or she want? Ask. Ask spouses, siblings, parents, cousins, friends, etc. Sometimes they don’t have good ideas either, or perhaps they’re struggling–like I do–to think of a suitable gift for the person who pretty much has everything he or she wants. Like my husband. Like my parents.
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nThat’s when we segue from “stuff” to “experience.” For instance, that recipient might appreciate tickets to a concert or play. My elder son loved his gift of driving a high-end sports car around a race track. These gifts don’t sit unused and collect dust on a shelf, they build memories. I think they make wonderful gifts.
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nSometimes a compromise between “stuff” and “experience” works well. I’m thinking of food. If your recipient is an cheese aficionado, then maybe a subscription to the Cheese of the Month Club is just what Santa ordered. You can find a subscription delivery service for practically anything, from flower bouquets to beers.
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nOf course, books make great gifts. If you look around, you’re likely to find a holiday bazaar or craft show in your locale or some other type of event at which you’ll find at least one local author selling his or her books. If you know your recipient reads within a certain genre, buy the book and get it autographed. It’s always a kick to get a book signed by the author, even if that author is someone completely unknown by the world. And if you buy a book for yourself, too, no one will blame you.
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nSpeaking as one of those authors, come to the Writer’s Block Author Fair on December 14 at the Franklin Park Mall, Toledo, Ohio. I’ll be there! Buy a book and I’ll be happy to sign it.n
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nAuthor
Hard boiled, scrambled, over easy, and sunny side up: eggs are the musings of Holly Bargo, the pseudonym for the author.
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Karen (Holly)
Blog Swaps
Looking for a place to swap blogs? Holly Bargo at Hen House Publishing is happy to reciprocate Blog Swaps in 2019.
For more information: